The Argumentalist

We have all come across someone who loves to argue. The Argumentalist. Often, their arguments just seem to be based on a subject that they know instigates a confrontational conversation or disagreement. So, if they know that you are passionate about something they will go out of their way to investigate and find information that can be rolled into the conversation simply to begin it. There is often an ulterior motive behind this and you must identify it before becoming involved in such a conversation. There is always a possibility that the person asking you the question(s) is genuine and sincerely desires answers. But not the Argumentalist! 

The Argumentalist will often begin by asking you a direct question.  More often than not, this will be a “leading question.” One that is designed, even calculated, to manipulate you into a specific pathway. It is almost like baiting you. When you become more aware of this kind of “conversation starter”, you will learn to be bold enough to answer that question with another question without committing yourself to answering that original one. For example:

“That’s an interesting question. You obviously have a reason for asking that, what is it?”

What this does, is to put the onuses on the Argumentalist to reveal his or her intent. Whether or not the question is a genuine search for the truth, or whether or not it is to try and disrupt or belittle the person to whom the question is put. If the intention is to begin an argument, you can immediately diffuse the situation by putting the Argumentalist into a defensive position rather than an offensive position. You have taken control.

There is a more respectable conversationalist known as an Apologist. These people are usually exceptionally versed in the Bible. Again, usually having studied it in great detail and, mostly, are given towards being teachers. Their role is to edify those who would also desire to learn more and better understand the holy Bible’s depth and beauty.

Now, the Argumentalist can be just as educated in the holy Bible as the Apologist, but they portray that knowledge in a perverse way designed to attack any Christian that is either new or less educated than themselves. Often, they target people who are of a different denomination than themselves or people who are babes in Christ because, as we all know, a baby is usually very vulnerable, an easy target. They can be easily swayed because of their ignorance or inexperience. This is why the ministerial offices of the Pastor and Teacher are held to such a high degree by the Lord and, why they are also offices which both new and mature church members closely scrutinize.

Before we go into anything further, we should look at some of the possible reasons why the Argumentalist argues. First, we must confirm the Argumentalist as being a born-again Christian because, if each is a Christian, we are going head-to-head with a brother or sister. The Bible tells us not to be in contention with each other because this does nothing more than begin to divide us from one another sadly.

Scripture tells us:

And if a kingdom be divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. 
And if a house be divided against itself, that house cannot stand. (Mark 3:24-25)

All that is necessary to ask is whether or not that person is born again. If the answer is no, you have an opportunity to witness to them and perhaps even lead them to the Lord. That would be awesome, wouldn’t it?

There can be several reasons why someone becomes an Argumentalist and these can be great insights to that person. The ulterior motive that we spoke about above could be one of many things. But, if we treat this as an opportunity to help the Argumentalist, we can perhaps eradicate the negative and steer them into the truth and perhaps even help them fulfil the calling on their life.

Stepping back from the situation you must become observant and listen closely to what is being said. So often you will find that the person who is confronting you, or challenging you, is hurting in themselves. Again, there could be a demonic presence which is trying to attack you by using someone over whom they have power.

Insecurities may be affecting the Argumentalist, they could simply be looking for a place to belong or a friend or family that they can trust. The answer to this is simply to love them and to help them and certainly not to fight them. Fight for them, but not them.

You may also have to deal with one of the most difficult aspects; one which can be so embedded that it can take a lot of time to remove and, or, overcome. This is pride.

Pride can feed the ego; pride can create narcissism; pride can develop an absolute hunger for self-recognition. This is an awful situation to be in because what is being said here is that the person has done it their way, completely removing God from the picture.

This is the absolute epitome of the strutting peacock. When he wants to be noticed he fans out all of these beautiful feathers making himself look bigger and trying to attract attention to himself. The male peacock’s cause is usually to attract a female, a peahen. In the prideful Argumentalist’s case, it is to attract attention to themselves. It is still pride and the Bible talks about this:

(1st John 2:16)  For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

Many times this is also the trait of a Narcissist who is focused on self to cause a complimentary response from someone who is in a position of power or, to whom they are attracted or, to whom they feel that they should, have the right to rule over.

How best to deal with the Argumentalist?

As with any question, the answer can be found in the Bible, whether it be an outright statement or a story portrayed by a person’s actions or dialogue. Our best example of dealing with an Agumentalist is to take Jesus as our foundation. Can you recall any instance where He argued with anyone? Even when He was being accused of something? The first thing He would do in a conversation with someone (not a teaching) was to listen to what was being said.  Once the person had finished talking (a great courtesy) He would answer them directly, or ask other questions to establish clarity in what the conversation was about or the root of the question. This is a great technique for any of us to adopt as we can receive the full information before judging and giving our reply.

A secret revealed:

So, in essence, when an argument arises, we should endeavour to prevent it from becoming a confrontation. The outcome can result in an undesired relationship, or the extreme of an irretrievable relationship parting. Wars have been known to start this way. But, if we address these differences in a true godly manner the worst result should only be where both parties agree to differ. That is where we have had doctrinal differences in Christian ministries and that is a subject for another day…..

An Anchored Position

Sometimes the Argumentalist will not listen or contend with different beliefs. They can be firmly anchored in their belief system and, it can be exceptionally difficult to get them to even listen at all to yours. Even if it is the true Gospel. Usually this is based upon long exposure to a doctrine and where fear has been threatened from leaders of that discipline. This is not too far from being a cult. However, if this type of situation arises for you, you must remember who you are and that every individual has been given the gift of choice. You should always consult the Lord and His Holy Spirit. It is His job to guide you into all truth and to (literally) put the right words in your mouth.

(1st Corinthians 4:5)  Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts: and then shall every man have praise of God.

Our goal should always be that whatever we do or say is done in love and respect for our brothers and sisters in Christ. When the other party is not a Christian, our intent should be to introduce them to Jesus and educate them through the Word, allowing it to do its work.